Stoutness Exercises

I've been going to the gym for nearly six months. I joined in early December, partly because I didn't want to get caught up in the post-Xmas rush, and partly because my conspicuous and depressing lack of fitness required urgent attention. Never thought I'd see the day, but I have Tim Wilton to blame/thank for putting me up to it. It had so clearly done him good that I went for it almost spontaneously.

I'm about to set off for my first visit in over a week, though, which is Not Good Enough. There have been a few such interludes, but this is probably the first that has been extended by straightforward laziness. It started off with having toothache and being concerned that writhing about clutching my jaw every ten minutes might be bad form, but once that recovered I just couldn't be bothered. The previous breaks have all had more genuine reasons associated with them - minor injuries and being away, but while I could have made it twice earlier in the week I didn't.

It's not just laziness, although that's certainly a component. It's also boredom. They do their best to make it "fun" by piping up-tempo pop everywhere and providing televisions to watch - usually Sky News in my case. But this does not detract sufficiently from the sheer tedium of plodding away on a cross-trainer or tugging at a few weight plates. The staff are almost worryingly cheerful, which is fine when you're "up" too, but slightly irritating if not. The showers are O.K. but someone seems to wander through with muddy feet every now and again (how? why?) so that despite constant cleaning they never quite make the grade.

It's got to be done though. Type 2 Diabetes, "dangerously high" triglycerides and barely controlled blood pressure suggest that without it I can look forward to a heart attack or stroke pretty soon otherwise. Just don't ask me to enjoy it. I do wonder how honest the people who say they do enjoy it are, to themselves as much as to other people. It's uncomfortable at best, mildly painful at worst, and a lot less fun than watching a DVD with a glass of wine. So don't give me all that "warm glow" guff. It's a necessary evil.